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Political correctness came so naturally to them.And now what was Eric to do other than spew out hollow platitudes? How could he distinguish himself from his colleagues when set against a bland wall of solidarity that abhorred the tragedy of a far distant apocalypse and pledged to help in every way possible?"Don't be a prick!" said Callum O'Leary, Fox News UK anchor, when Eric confided in his anxieties after he'd answered the scripted questions on live television with a soggy account of how British government aid would help the suffering millions in Kazakhstan, Afghanistan, Tajikistan and the other republics the pronunciation of whose names Eric had been rehearsing over the last few hours. "News moves on. People will soon get as bored of watching mushroom clouds over Samarkand as they did the ones over Faisalabad. Pretty soon the news will focus on radioactive fallout, viral mutations and lawlessness amongst refugees. And where there's chaos there's opportunity for the Conservative. She’s probably going to L.A., I thought as I forlornlyboarded my plane. I couldn’t get the picture of herflushed face and pushpin nipples, erect withexcitement, out of my head. Luckily, my tray hid thebulge in my pants when the stewardess served me mydrink. As soon as she was gone, I headed for thebathroom to quickly whack off, covering my crotch withan issue of ‘Elle’ which would serve me once I was inthe restroom as well.The slot on the first door read ‘Unoccupied’. I pushedit open and there stood the ‘Ben-wa ball girl’,completely naked, bent over to examine her shaved pussyfor ingrown hairs. Before I could stammer out anapology, she yanked me into the tiny room, shut thedoor and slid the Occupied sign in place.“Thank God!” she declared. “I’ve been waiting 20minutes for someone to use this toilet.”She clamped a hand over my mouth when I tried to speak.“We have to be very quiet,” she whispered,.
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